it is late, well for today anyway, and as i drip down the stairs and fall upon my pillow i shut my blue/grey eyes from this world. i roll back and forth- i can almost feel your hands smoothing out mine, and your tender touches on the small of my back. i pull out my pony tail and my hair falls gracefully onto the pillow. now i hear your voice whispering like a breeze on a warm august evening, nothing i understand, but it doesn't matter anyhow. i roll onto my back only to be taken by images of your mouth. i memorize your lips. i am mezmorized by them. i could look at them all.... harsh tones cry out, blinding light picks at my eyes, they scream as they slowly peel open. and i realize, you're not here. you're not here.